Please Help!! My Sisters Boyfriend..?

Question by walksideways: Please help!! My sisters boyfriend..?
My sister is dating this guy who:
-Went to jail for 6 mos for theft (said he didnt do it)-was let out 1 yr ago (supposedly he stole from this guy he thought owed him money)
-Has a DUI right now
-Failing all his classes
-Very slow from (says he doesnt anymore)
-Has to pay a lot of money every month for beating up this girl and her car with his ex-wife (says he didnt do it)
-discharged from the army (for letting someone live with him-he says)
-etc etc

My family doesnt want him dating her. I dont think hes that awful of a guy but that he makes bad decisions, often because he isnt smart enough to think them out.
She is smart and in college (3/4 done), shes 21, hes 25, but she has made many bad choices on ex boyfriends (we have restraining orders against one).

She keeps telling us that we are being judgmental against him and that we should ‘love him’ because she does.

I dont know what to say to her and I am disappointed because I feel she is going to get hurt. I dont want her to force her to make any decision but I do want her to think more about her decisions and stop being so controlled by her emotions. What can I say to help this situation? My parents made her go to “Christian counseling” which didnt help at all. (Im not Christian so I suppose there might be some bias there) Please help!!!

Best answer:

Answer by JennyH
Your sister is old enough to make her own decisions, and unfortunately there isn’t really anything you can do. Pretty much the way I look at it is….What does this guy have to offer her? Doesn’t seem like he would be able to provide for her…or a family…sounds like she would be supporting them. He has a horrible record, and it seems to me that it would make it hard to get a job. He abused a girl…he can say he didn’t do it all he wants, they had enough proof to charge him with something. You can’t get thrown out of the army for having somebody live with you. He sounds like a liar. You could throw those couple things her way. But, sometimes love is blind…and unfortunately in most cases, she’ll probably get hurt.

Answer by alex07
your sister is unaware of disaster ahead of her, she is blind n thought your wise advice as being judgemental. He will steal n hit her n cheat on her, if that is what she wants, she will get it.This her downfall, her future will crash unless all of you pray for some miracles to get him out of her life.
Tell him he should go n watch how he react…wish you all a safe journey.

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Matters of Record for April 29, 2013
Sir J. Smith, 37, 845 E. Upham Road, Duluth, domestic assault by strangulation, fined $ 50 and 21 months in prison, time stayed two years with conditions including six months of local confinement and counseling; domestic assault, dismissed. … E … Read more on Duluth News Tribune

Courthouse records
As conditions of probation, he was ordered to remain drug- and alcohol-free, to undergo substance abuse and mental health evaluations with treatment and counseling as recommended by the Probation Department, to submit to random drug tests, to have no … Read more on Worcester Telegram


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