Is Love Enough?
Question by Karen: Is love enough?
Here we go…..I have been married for 13 years and have 3 amazing daughters. As with most people, my husband & I had fun before starting a family. We went out with friends and partied. Once you start a family though, I believe, things should change SOME. My husband is an alcoholic. I know, I know, I know! I have been through all of it. The thing is….I really love this man more than anything. And I truly do not think divorce is always the best and quickest escape. I love him soooo much but dislike him a lot. I feel I have tried EVERYTHING….ignore it, get angry, talk through it, get proffesional help, etc. etc. etc. Anyone who lives with an alcoholic knows exactly what I am saying. I am literally at a loss now. I just feel that maybe loving him just isn’t enough. I try so hard to hold on but feel I am losing my grip. Please….if there is anyone who can give me words of encougagement…..do so. IS THERE HOPE? Or should I finally let go before I have wasted my whole life on this man?
He does not abuse us. He is amazing with the kids. I do worry about them seeing his drinking though. He has been in trouble with it and has taken classes for it but does it only because he is required to. He has a very loving side to him and HAS quit drinking for up to a few months at a time. He always starts up again slowly. Before I know it he is drinking heavy again. It is a cycle he goes through. I feel deep inside he means good.
Best answer:
Answer by ndnqt1966
So you have tried everything to get your husband to stop…everything but LEAVING HIM! You still are enabling him by staying with him. He really has no reason to get help with his drinking when he knows that you will not leave. Hopefully by leaving him, he will see what he will be losing if he still continues to drink. I know that you don’t want to leave him….but honestly I think it is the best decision at this point. If he still refuses to get help…then divorce is the final step. You don’t need to waste another second of your life trying to help someone who refuses to help them self.
EDIT: Do you realize that your husband is an alcoholic? This means he will ALWAYS be an alcoholic….even if he goes through treatment….He can NEVER drink again because of his disease.
Answer by Sheila m
so ur husband wont go to counseling for help i persume. you said u have been thru it all. does he abuse u and the kids? if he abuses u and ur kids then please do gt out. i know u love him dearly but if u and the kids are so very miserable and if he abuses u gt out it wont gt any better. i was married to an abuser who which was an alcoholic also and when he started on my kids i was gone. no mater if i lvoed him or not. you can only be put thru so much and u lose it. now our daughter who is now 21 has a baby and my ex and i talk and were bettr now as friends then we were before. i wish u luck and god bless and keep you and ur loved ones.
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